Sonya Bateman is the author of a new urban fantasy series that debuted on March 30, 2010 with MASTER OF NONE. The tag line for this book is what caught my attention: ‘One unlucky thief. One unlikely genie. One very odd couple.’ I’m loving these new unconventional urban fantasy series that have sprung up lately, and now with the addition of MASTER OF NONE, I can’t wait to throw a genie into the mix. I’m so pleased that Sonya (and her main character Gavyn) are here today to give us the inside scoop on what her book is about and try to answer ‘The Question.’…and did I mention the International giveaway? See details below.
Sonya Bateman (and Gavyn Donatti) on
“The Question.”
The most frequently asked question by far, whenever you tell someone you’ve written a book, is the dreaded “What’s your book about?” It’s a tough question, because you’ve got this three to four hundred page story, and it’s “about” a lot of things, but the person who’s asked the question doesn’t want to hear a half-hour rambling diatribe. They don’t even want you to recite the two to four paragraphs of cover copy on the book. They want the essence of the story. Simple, easy to remember.
Like this: “The movie ‘Aliens’ is like Jaws in space.”
That’s the formula Hollywood uses to describe high-concept movies. If you can come up with a recognizable one-liner that describes your novel, it’s the best answer to The Question, and the one most likely to interest the person who asked in reading the book.
I’m still struggling with a one-liner for MASTER OF NONE. So far, it goes something like this:
“It’s like Aladdin, only set in modern times, and the thief is a professional with chronic bad luck, and the genie doesn’t grant wishes – actually, he’s more like Jafar than the genie in Aladdin – and there’s a Jasmine, but everybody calls her Jazz, and she’s not a princess, but there is a princess, and...”
At this point, the questioner loses interest and wanders away.
Talking isn’t my strong suit. That’s why I write. So, given a few moments of reading time, what’s the best way to tell someone what your book is about? There’s the cover blurb, of course. And sample chapters. But those are standard, and it’s hard to use them to show what makes a novel different from all the other insert-genre-here novels out there.
I’ve decided to let one of my characters describe what the book is about, so I’ll pass the floor to him now. And the next time somebody pops The Question – well, I’ll probably mutter, “It’s like Jaws in space” and wander away.
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You don’t know me, and I probably don’t know you. Unless I’ve robbed you—and if that’s the case, sorry about that. It’s nothing personal. Just a job.
Anyway, my name’s Gavyn Donatti—yes, that’s really my name—and I’m a thief. You can call me Donatti. Try and pronounce it right. It’s not that hard. Oh, and about the thief thing? Don’t worry too much. I won’t steal anything from you that you can’t afford to lose. I’m really a decent guy.
I’m just not that lucky.
See, at the moment, I’m kind of running for my life from this barely evolved gorilla named Trevor. He’s a crazy bastard, and I shouldn’t have taken the job, but I did. And then I lost the score. Yeah, I told you I didn’t have any luck. Trevor wants this thing bad—and he’s going to kill me when he finds out I don’t have it.
I don’t mean that metaphorically. He’s really going to kill me. If I’m lucky, he’ll shoot me...but I’m not, so he’ll probably torture me to death.
How did I lose the score? Oh, man. If I knew that, I’d have it back by now. I check into this motel after I hit the place, so I can clean up and get a little rest. No problems. I call Trevor, let him know I’ll see him soon. Take a piss. Then, when I come out, my jacket’s on the bed with the pockets turned out, all my s--- scattered, and the damned thing’s gone. Just vanished, like so much f---ing smoke. The door’s still locked, the window’s closed, nobody’s in the room but me, and it’s gone.
Yeah. Lucky me.
That was a few days ago, and I’ve been running since. And something weird’s going on, too. Ever think you’re being followed? I mean, obviously, Trevor’s thugs are after me. But this is something different. Sometimes it’s just a feeling, and not a good one. Like there’s somebody standing right across the room, or over my shoulder, actively hating my guts. Once in a while it’s little things, physical things—a door opens, papers ruffle when there’s no breeze, my keys jump off a table. And I hear sounds. Footsteps, thumps, creaking floors. Last night, I swore I heard somebody breathing right behind me, but I turned around, and nothing.
Maybe I’m losing my mind. Hell, it wouldn’t surprise me. Running for your life tends to cause a little stress. Or maybe I’m being haunted by some pissed-off ghost. Can’t be somebody I killed, though. I may have stolen more s--- than a stadium full of purse-snatchers, but I’m no murderer. At least, not yet. But if it comes down to Trevor or me, I might break that whole innocent streak. I’m not quite ready to die. I still have overdue books out from the library.
Oh, s---. That sedan outside looks about as unobtrusive as a tiger in a lingerie store. Gotta run. Again. Wish me luck...
Forget luck. I’m gonna need a miracle.
Thanks Sonya (and Donatti) for stopping by. Come back anytime.
Giveaway(International)
One copy of MASTER OF NONE by Sonya Bateman
Gavyn Donatti is the world’s unluckiest thief...
Just ask all the partners he’s lost over the years. And when
he loses an irreplaceable item that he was hired to steal for
his ruthless employer, Trevor—well, his latest bungle just
might be his last. But then his luck finally turns: right when
Trevor’s thugs have Donatti cornered, a djinn, otherwise
known as a genie, appears to save him.
Unfortunately, this genie—who goes by the very non-magical
name of “Ian”—is more Hellboy than dream girl. An
overgrown and extremely surly man who seems to hate
Donatti on the spot, he may call Donatti master, but he isn’t
interested in granting three wishes. He informs Donatti that
he is bound to help the thief fulfill his life’s purpose, and then
he will be free. The problem is that neither Donatti nor Ian
has any idea what exactly that purpose is.
At first Donatti’s too concerned with his own survival to look
a gift genie in the mouth, but when his ex-girlfriend Jazz and
her young son get drawn into the crossfire, the stakes
skyrocket. And when Ian reveals that he has an agenda of his
own—with both Donatti and the murderous Trevor at the
center of it—Donatti will have to become the man he never
knew he could be—or the entire world could pay the price… .
Click HERE to read the first chapter of MASTER OF NONE.
GIVEAWAY GUIDLINES
- Open Internationally (Thank you Sonya!)
- Leave a comment or question for Sonya, or tell us what is your most dreaded ‘Question,’ to be asked.
- Entries must be received by Midnight MST on April 9th (check back on April 11th to see if you won).
Interested in guest blogging on All Things Urban Fantasy? CONTACT ME
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